Tom and Debbie's Mission Blog: Summer Reunions and Transitions

We just celebrated Labor Day, so summer is about complete. This has been a summer full of reunions and transitions. We had reunions with our posterity for four days in St. George, with Debbie's siblings and their posterity in Midway, with my mother's posterity in South Jordan and with my cousins, also in South Jordan. The biggest reunion of all was my mother's funeral, which brought friends and family from far and near, recent and past. We wrote blogposts specifically about our family reunion and the passing of my mother so we won't cover them in detail in this blogpost, but they were a major part of our summer. We are grateful for the opportunity to renew acquaintances and strengthen relationships with our family members. No matter what happens in life, these relationships are a solid and special part of who we are.

These relationships are important while life seems to be in a constant transition. This summer has brought much of that in our own family. During these past few months, Gina and her family moved to Texas for new employment for Danny, while Lamoni, Moroni, Jacob and our oldest grandchildren, Braden and Sabrina and their families, moved into new living accommodations and/or new jobs. We (Tom and Debbie) also moved from our downstairs home to occupy the space in the upstairs of our condo after mom passed away. Even Pollyanna's children moved into new rooms to make space for little Skylar who will be arriving soon.

Eight Cousins representing the four families with children from our grandfather, Johann Rueckert

Family Reunions and Gatherings:

Last year, Debbie and her siblings decided to hold a summer reunion for their joint posterity. As our families have grown, we have had more difficulty getting together. It was a hit and hopefully now has become an annual tradition. Debbie's brother Gary has a big yard with his home in Midway and it is a perfect gathering place. This year we enjoyed our second annual reunion with approximately 60 in attendance on July 9. Siblings enjoy visiting together, but we also love visiting with our nieces and nephews and their families. For most of them, this is the only time during the year that we get to see them.

After a delicious hot dog buffet with traditional desserts, many of the adults enjoyed visiting while . . .

Most of the kids were playing croquet or baseball (a bigger group) or frisbee golf or enjoying the playground

Also last year, we decided to start a family reunion for the posterity of me and my siblings. We did it late in the year last year but planned better this time around. We held the reunion just one week after Debbie's family on July 16. We rented a park near our home in South Jordan. It is the perfect size for our family reunion. It turns out that this reunion was the last time that my mother left her home. We felt that the timing was perfect as she passed away only 12 days later. Although not healthy, she enjoyed the association with 70 of her posterity. Once again we had croquet, volleyball and frisbee golf and snow cones furnished by Aunt Becky. We really enjoying having this opportunity to also associate with our nieces and nephews, especially the children of Andy and Mike who are no longer with us. Once again my brother, Dan, brought his family from California to participate.

Again, plenty of fun conversations with relationships that we all enjoy

In larger groups and smaller groups, four families represented here

As I mentioned, just 2 and a half weeks later, we were all together in increased numbers for my mother's funeral. Only 2 and a half weeks after that we enjoyed our scheduled extended family reunion, for the posterity of my grandfather, Johann Adam Rueckert. We started holding these several years ago, meeting each two or three years. The attendance is primarily comprised of our generation of cousins and their spouses, but we have enjoyed having a few of the next generations with us. This has become a tradition that we all look forward to. In attendance was the oldest cousin from each of the families that came from my Grandpa Rueckert. I feel like these reunions are bringing us cousins closer together than we had been when we were younger. I believe that as we get older, we enjoy this feeling of belonging to a family bigger than our own. My mother was almost the last of the previous generation. My aunt Lajuana is the last one remaining, but she was unable to be with us at this reunion.

This is most of the attendees from the Extended Rueckert Reunion

Same pavilion, but mostly different relatives. Same feeling of love!

More joyful conversations. As we get older, that is what we enjoy most!

Besides our formal reunions, we spend a lot of time in the summer with other family activities. The most meaningful of all was the baptism of our grandson, Dawson. This occurred on July 2, just a week before the Moeller reunion. He was so excited to be baptized and his family hosted family and friends on both sides to a social afterwards.

Dawson with his grandparents on his baptism day

Dawson with his family and his grandparents. This photo was perhaps the last photo taken by my mother in her life

Dawson's baptism party before the guests sat down

Just two days later, on the Fourth of July, our son Jacob decided to host a barbecue at our condo for some family and some of his friends. So, even if we don't plan a party, we still get to participate.

Playing games after the barbecue, friends and family together

One thing unique about the activity was our granddaughter, Sophia. She came with Giovanna and Leo. She is still very shy around her American grandparents. However this time, uncle Ben was here. She had only met Ben once, but they became fast friends. It helped that Ben speaks Portuguese to her. We really enjoyed seeing this interaction, even if we were a bit jealous. This seems to be a gift that Ben has, interacting with young children.

Sophia and Ben becoming friends

Sophia and Ben riding the Stair Chair

The previous day I made a visit to Camila. I took her mother, Beth, and her brother, Ben, with me. Camila doesn't recognize anyone and doesn't communicate, but she is still our family. We have had difficulty understanding her level of challenge in this life. Even though her quality of life is greatly diminished, somehow her body continues to function at a minimal level. I know that God knows what is best and we believe that Camila's eternal blessings are sure. Her health and her appetite continues to decline. At this visit, she refused the dinner that was offered her. At this time, we had no idea that my mother would pass away before Camila. Still we trust in the understanding of our Father in Heaven.

Camila with her brother, Ben, and her mother, Beth.

With my daughter, Camila

Also in July we celebrated Grant's 4th birthday in Provo. This was our last family visit with Gina and her family before they moved to Texas. It was held at Danny's grandmother's house where they flood irrigated the yard. The great grandchildren had a blast with the water. We are already missing this special family.

Most of the family in the irrigation water

Gina with her twins who love the water

Grant squirting his grandpa with a squishy water balloon

Transitions:

As my mother passed away, the transition has been more difficult than we expected. Each day that we came home to an empty house or looked into her empty room or ate dinner without her, we missed her. We are very happy that she is able to be back with my dad after so many years apart. She was not only my mother but an integral part of our lives since we returned from our mission 5 years ago. Except for our mission, this is the first time in our married life that Debbie and I have lived alone in our home. We are now empty nesters for the first time!

Before moving upstairs we decided to make a few changes. The first one was to replace the upstairs carpets. We thought that this would be a good time before we started moving bedroom furniture upstairs. We went ahead and ordered carpet that was to be installed on August 15. Through various challenges, especially of communication within the carpet company, this did not occur until in the afternoon of August 19. The stairs did not get completed until the following week on August 26. Although the timing was frustrating for us, the end product ended up as we wanted. On August 19, we spent our first night sleeping upstairs. Over the next several days and weeks we completed the transition, including replacing the toilet in our bathroom. As we finally have moved upstairs, we are getting more accustomed to mom's absence. The photos below show some of the efforts to remodel our home.

Mom's old bedroom

The same room with the new carpet

Stretching the carpet in the parlor

Seaming it together in our family room

And installing it on the stairs the following week

In the end, the new master bedroom, master bathroom and family room are now organized and decorated to our needs and desires. This was a more difficult task than we imagined. It does help us to move on without our mother.

Our new bedroom, quite a bit more roomy than we are used to. It feels like home!

Our own master bathroom with separate sinks and plenty of closet space. We haven't even used our jetted tub yet, but we will.

At the end of our master bathroom is the toilet and shower room which now has a new toilet with a self-closing lid. This was installed by yours truly.

This is our new family room which also doubles for our missionary work space. This makes it easier to work and still be close to answering the door upstairs and coordinating cooking and eating.

Right after mom passed away, Gina moved to Texas with her family. She also had a significant transition, which she has handled very well. They have quickly gotten involved in their new ward, Danny's new job and school for the older children. When they first arrived in their new "rental home", their furniture and stuff didn't arrive for almost two weeks. So they enjoyed a new house without furniture. They borrowed some of our air mattresses to sleep on during this time and made the best of their situation. We will be able to go visit them next month when Addie gets baptized. The following are a few photos of their new and empty residence.

Their new residence with southern landscaping

Grant in their living space

Hudson in their kitchen without dishes or cooking utensils

A month after mom's passing we went to the cemetery to see the new home for her body. We were disappointed that nothing had changed since her burial, no burial stones or new grass. I guess for some of us, the transition goes slower than we would like.

Debbie in front of the earth put on top of the casket

Still no headstones moved back for my mother or my father

As the school year began, our granddaughter, McKenzie, started playing on the volleyball team at Granger High School. As the uniforms were passed out, she chose number 19 in memory of her great grandmother, since her birthday is on September 19. We thought that was a pretty cool idea. The reality is that my mother has a permanent home in all of our hearts and memories.

Mckenzie playing proud in her game with her number 19 clearly displayed

Moroni also moved into a new apartment of his own. It becomes a home that he can have his daughter staying with him without complications. It was a big but positive move for Moroni. He also started back working for Amazon deliveries and is able to have enough overtime to be able to pay for the increased rent cost. We got a guided tour of his new residence by his daughter Tiare on FaceTime.

A screen shot of Moroni's apartment from outside during our "tour"

Lamoni also moved into his new rental home in preparation for his upcoming marriage. We had a wonderful visit with Lamoni and Aide. It is amazing the strength that a wife already is for Lamoni, even before the marriage occurs. We love Aide! Unfortunately, we didn't take photos.

As Lamoni moved out of his apartment with Jacob, Braden and his family moved in to be Jacob's new roommates. This is a step up for Braden who has his own living space for the first time since Marcie was born three years ago. So far this has been a very successful transition for Braden and his family and also for Jacob.

Both Jacob and Lamoni are also experiencing new jobs that they started in July, more transitions.

We are aware that our oldest grandchild, Sabrina, has moved with her husband to Florida while he does his residency to become a doctor. They are expecting their first child later this month. Even though they are far away, we are happy to see their growth and excitement.

We just enjoyed a Labor Day dinner with Pollyanna and her family and were able to see the new accommodations for their new baby that will be born later this month. Aria moved to a bedroom downstairs, Paisley moved into Aria's room and Paisley's room will be the new nursery for Skylar. More transitions in preparation for this new bundle of joy.

Paisley showing us her old room that will be the nursery for Skylar

We even have experienced transitions with our temple ordinance work at the Jordan River Temple last week as we welcomed a new Temple Presidency. In reality, this is a major transition as a new temple presidency assumes the leadership for over 4,000 temple workers and so many thousands of patrons. We are grateful that our Heavenly Father is in charge of this transition, because it is too big for human efforts alone.

Our outgoing temple presidency. We have loved serving with them over the past three years.

When the new temple presidencies around the world were trained, we were invited to be part of a temple department training, watching the same video feeds from the First Presidency, Apostles and others. This was a big perk for our Church Service Mission. It was inspiring to participate in this event and understand what is being shared with new temple presidencies. Even though we can't share much of what we hear, I would like to share some comments from Elder Bednar. They were referenced in a preparation meeting from a member of the Jordan River Temple Presidency today. I am paraphrasing, but Elder Bednar explained that we tend to focus our thoughts on the temple, where we receive sacred covenants and ordinances which lead us to the Savior. He says we should change our viewpoint to, Come to the Savior through covenants and ordinances in the temple. It may seem similar, but the idea is that our focus needs to be on our Savior Jesus Christ in all that we do, especially in the temple. The temples are beautiful boxes, but the precious content is the Savior.

Even our service mission is experiencing transition. We have had three new missionary couples join us in the past few weeks and assignments have been modified to lessen the dependence on temple department employees. We have taken a larger role in coordinating the interviews with priesthood leaders around the world where new temples are being built. This gives us a chance to learn new skills and hopefully serve in a way that will bless the members in these areas.

A photo of one of our weekly collaboration meetings with the other missionaries and temple employees. This includes two of the new missionary couples.

Come Follow Me Learnings:

During this summer we have been studying the wisdom literature books in our Come Follow Me Study. This includes Job, Psalms, Proverbs and Ecclesiastes. In the time that followed my mother's death, we spent three weeks studying the Psalms. This opened our minds and hearts to a different way to express our love and praise to our Heavenly Father. I wrote a special psalm for my mother which I included in the previous blog. Debbie wrote a psalm praising her God for his hand in her life that I wanted to share in this blog:

My Life’s Psalm by Debbie Rueckert

O Lord, my God, my soul delights to praise thy name forever.

Thou hast been my constant guide.

Thou hast led me along life’s uncharted highway.

Thou hast carried me when walking forward became unbearable.

Thou hast carried me during dark days when my dreams were dashed upon the rocks of life.

Thou hast held me in Thine arms in my loneliness and sorrow when I thought all was lost.

Thy loving arms engulfed me when I no longer cared to live.

O Lord, my God,I praise thy name forever.

Thou hast always been my guide.

I have felt thy goodness and mercy as I passed through the refiner’s fire.

Thy loving kindness was upon me as thou molded me into whom you wanted me to become.

O Lord, my God, Thou who knowest all things from the beginning.

I praise thee for allowing me to experience the miracle of bringing one of thy choice righteous sons back into my life.

Thou hast been the choreographer of my eternal marriage in the New and Everlasting Covenant.

I praise thy name for allowing me to hear thy voice, and giving me a sure knowledge of whom my eternal companion would be.

Thou hast taken the ashes of my life and created beauty beyond measure.

Thy goodness and greatness have brought me out of the darkest Abis into the glorious light beyond description.

Glory and honor be thine forever. Amen

As we finished our study of the Psalms, I felt inspired to write a psalm of praise for the goodness and greatness of my God. This is also included here:

Praise Be to My Lord by Tom Rueckert

My Lord has created the heavens and the earth and all things therein. He provides moisture and sustenance for all of His creations. He calms the sea and causes the gentle breeze. His love for the widows and the orphan, the poor and the needy, brings them their needed relief and eternal compensation. His plan sees the past and the future. He rewards the meek and welcomes all that come unto Him with open arms. Praise be to the creator of all mankind.

Praise God for his lovingkindness and tender mercies. He is great and has all power, yet He still knows and loves me individually. He knows all that I think and feel and sees into my heart. He provides answers and direction for my eternal good. This all knowing power is extended to all of His children. My mind cannot comprehend it. My soul is full of gratitude. Praise the Lord.

In my weakness He reveals His strength and wisdom. His grace is sufficient for all of my righteous desires, uttered and unexpressed. He reveals His marvelous will to me, His humble servant, and guides my steps to His heavenly home. I know not where to turn yet I rejoice in knowing that He does. I trust in His understanding of the past and the future, of my life and my eternal destiny. For His everlasting love I am eternally grateful. Praise be to my God.

My Lord has descended from His heavenly throne to bear my earthly burdens. His bowels are filled with compassion, evidenced by His infinite sacrifice. He gave all that I might be blessed with His glory. He showed us the way and redeemed us with His precious blood. I stand all amazed at this love that He has offered me. Praise be to Him forever more.

My Savior became perfect, grace by grace, always submitting His will to His Father. He now opens the same door for me, guiding me through His word, providing living oracles to share His light. My earthly stewardship is designed in love with my own gifts and circumstances. My trials and afflictions are but for a moment, meant to refine my soul in His wisdom. Through His grace I too can be perfected if I will give Him my will. In the embrace of His arms, He will wipe away all of my tears. Praise be to the Redeemer of all mankind.

As we finished our study of Proverbs, I was impressed with the words relating to knowledge, wisdom and understanding. The following came from my study journal:

What has the Holy Ghost taught me this week?

As I have studied and pondered the principle of trusting in the Lord and seeking His wisdom, understanding and knowledge, I was touched by Proverbs 9 :9 Give instruction to a wise man, and he will be yet wiser: teach a just man, and he will increase in learning. 10 The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom: and the knowledge of the holy is understanding.

As I pondered the need to receive counsel and reproof from the Lord, I sought the Lord in prayer. As He always does, He gave me “His Counsel”, to Expect Miracles! I have had this on my mind often in the past year as President Nelson has repeated it often. However as I prayed, this had not been in my mind. The answer was clear, His wisdom. Now I need to study this principle more diligently and act in more faith to “expect miracles”.

Another commentary described the difference of knowledge, wisdom and understanding that I really liked which follows:

Knowledge
Wisdom by applying knowledge, acting on it
Understanding from processing what I experienced.

As I have pondered this today in the temple, I realized that we came to this earth to learn from our experiences choosing between good and evil. All of a sudden I realized that this life experience is necessary so that we can "experience" life's challenges. Through that we will obtain an understanding that we could not obtain in any other way. It all came together in my mind and in my heart. I find that as I reflect on my life's experiences, I can see the hand of the Lord so clearly. As defined in the scripture quoted above, I learn the "knowledge of the holy", or the hand of the Lord, and that "is understanding".

So as we are transitioning in our lives, let us remember that as we apply knowledge in our actions, let's make sure we process our experience and learn from it. That will make it all worthwhile.

Other Activities:

During these summer months, we have tried to take advantage of time that our grandchildren can attend the temple to do baptisms for the dead. In the spring we took them to the Draper Temple. During the summer we were able to make appointments to do baptisms at the Oquirrh Mountain, Bountiful and Jordan River Temple. In this process we are able to do more and more baptisms for those individuals that we identified in our trip to Germany in May. We love these activities and these grandchildren.

With Joseph, Jon, Joshua, McKenzie and Abbie at the Bountiful Temple in July

A late Saturday night baptism session in early August at the Jordan River Temple with Joseph, Joshua, McKenzie and Abbie.

With Abbie and McKenzie at the Jordan River Temple in late August

We still make time to enjoy a few special events, just the two of us. One of them was at the Hale Center Theater in early July, right before mom started her decline. We watched a rendition of Singin' in the Rain. What made it especially fun was the actual rain occurring in the theater. it made for a wet and enjoyable play. In this case, we had front row seats!

At Singing' in the Rain at Hale Center Theater

Remaining water on the stage and on the areas below the stage during intermission, right after the Singing' in the Rain dance.

We have to add an action shot from McKenzie's volleyball game. She was awesome!

This was a perfect photo of McKenzie's amazing return of the volleyball from the second row

We all know that rising gas prices have caused concern for all of us. We are pleased to say that we are doing our share of conservation with our Toyota Prius hybrid car. During a small stretch in July, we had four wonderful days in a row. The best mileage was on July 7 when we went to the temple and back from our condo basically on battery power, 199 miles a gallon.

Photo of our daily log in our hybrid Toyota Prius

June, July and August Birthdays not included in previous blogposts:

As always, we enjoy celebrating birthdays with our grandchildren. We have had three grandchildren birthdays in Pennsylvania that did not receive a personal visit or photo. The remaining birthday photos follow: